I Just Watched (Films)

[Rusty]

Nobody 2
They underuse Sharon Stone, she deserved a bit more kickassery.

I didn't even know it was her until the credits came up!

[Stormbringer]

Extreme Prejudice

A 80s film about a tough but emotionally stunted Texas Ranger, Jack (Nick Nolte), who takes a stand against his old high school friend, now Mexican drug lord, Cash (Powers Boothe). Cash is shipping drugs across the border, and both men share the same Mexican girlfriend, Sarita (Maria Alonso). Cash has a private army and Jack is a crack shot, so things are gonna get violent.

But, just to add some total chaos into the mix, a squad of undercover special forces fighters, led by Major Hackett (Michael Ironside), a 'Zombie Unit' who are all 'officially' deceased (but their deaths faked so they can continue operating undercover) are also on the scene, on a secret clandestine mission, which of course crashes head-on into the main plot.

Did I like it? Not really, but there were some entertaining and violent gunfights and plenty of unapologetic 80s machismo.

[Animalmother]

Barbarian
That was something different
Fucking nuts to say the least but very much fun. I did prefer Weapons but possibly because I saw it first. You can't really say anything about the it without spoiling it. The fact that one character says "What the fuck..." about 5 times in a row pretty much sums it up.

I believe the director was involved with Companion which is another fun film.

[Animalmother]

Aliens Directors Cut
Just went to see this in the cinema with the gf. She'd somehow never seen it (or any of the Alien series). It's definitely showing its age now, on a 4K screen it looks like a tv movie in places. Some of the acting is rough and the blue screen effects look like shit. There's a reason the extra 30 minutes or so were cut, it kills the pacing.

However... the sound effects are phenomenal. The first blast from the smart gun and every subsequent ripple from the pulse rifle reverberates through your soul. The motion tracker is the greatest tension setter in a film. The practical effects are fantastic. The last hour is just an utter joy. It hardly let's up with the action and the stakes keep getting higher. The gf really enjoyed it, which was a massive relief..

Still fucking awesome.

[Hatredsheart]

Damn! Need to watch the 4k again now....

[Animalmother]

Toxic Avenger 2025
I've never seen any of the originals so wasn't sure how it was going to be. Its both great and trash at the same time, reminded me a bit of Crank. Over the top gore (all practical), cheesy dialogue and ridiculous situations. Peter Dinklage is great and Kevin Bacon looks like he's having a hoot. Definitely worth a watch.

[Wrathbone]

Mission Impossible: Final Reckoning

It was… fine. Probably my least favourite since Rogue Nation, as it’s too long, too pleased with itself and more interested in stunning shots than a satisfying story. There’s a lengthy sequence on a submarine which I’m sure was a true technical challenge to film, but in reality is bloody boring.

As always, MI is a good time for the most part. I’m just not sure this stuck the landing as well as it should have.

6/10

[Hatredsheart]

Mission Impossible: Final Reckoning

It was… fine. Probably my least favourite since Rogue Nation, as it’s too long, too pleased with itself and more interested in stunning shots than a satisfying story. There’s a lengthy sequence on a submarine which I’m sure was a true technical challenge to film, but in reality is bloody boring.

As always, MI is a good time for the most part. I’m just not sure this stuck the landing as well as it should have.

6/10

This is the most accurate review of the movie I've seen so far.

[Stormbringer]

Napoleon: The Director's Cut

I haven't seen the theatrical cut, so can't compare it with that, but did I enjoy this three-and-a-half-hour epic?

No.

I found it dull and meandering and unengaging. I suppose it is in some senses a character study on narcissism and what happens when you hand a narcissist total power over a nation (though we can see that in real life just now). My wife and I couldn't understand afterwards what the message of the film was. It seemed to be, we thought, that Napoleon was a complicated man...a megalomaniac, but with passionate love for Josephine, underpinning everything else.

And yet...Josephine is little more than a sex object in the film. She has no real depth or personality...so that wasn't really believable.

What I will say in its favour, is that Scott has always been a master of visuals. He knows how to make his historical films into spectacular living paintings, more than any other director I have seen. This was no exception. At least for the indoor scenes in Paris, and the Egyptian campaign.

The later battlefield scenes, particularly Waterloo, not so much. They were pretty boring and uninspired; run-of-the-mill stuff, with horrible blue filters, bringing down the overall quality of the production.

Overall, the film felt too ambitious. Like Napoleon himself, reaching too high and falling short of true greatness. This is not one for the cinematic history books.

[Wrathbone]

I haven't seen it yet, as I was holding out for a disc version that never happened (outside of some bootlegs). Not sure I can muster any enthusiasm for it now.

[Alan]

Bride Of Frankenstein
Went to see this scored live by a full orchestra and it was magic! Especially the bombastic ending. That bit with the tiny people still amazes me, such a well done effect.

Phantom Of The Opera 1925
Accompanied by a dude of a Wurlitzer and it was amazing! You’d never know it was one dude (well and a lass that did some fantastic operatic vocals). That Wurlitzer is a cracking, beautiful machine. As for the movie it’s amazing how well they use light and shadows for something so early

The Unholy Three
Silent movie with live music. I hadn’t seen it and it’s actually a really good little movie about three carnies pulling heists. A midget that pretends to be a baby, a ventriloquist that dresses up like an old woman and the strong man. Enjoyed it!

The Feast
Welsh language folk horror about a weird dinner party. It’s decent, maybe doesn’t come together at the end that well but it’s well filmed and atmospheric.

The return Of Doctor X
Bogarts only horror movie and even though everyone says it’s shite I enjoyed it!

John Wick The Ballerina
Meh. It was fine. I am a bit tired of the John Wick world now so it was underwhelming.

Frankenstein (Del Torro)
Reinforces my belief that Del Torro is the fantasy Chris Nolan. Amazing visual artist, shite film maker. Woefully dull, why does Frankenstein roar like a jet engine? Visually lovely though and the creation sequence is very nice!

Toxic Avenger
What is this CG shite? There’s like 2 alright bits but most of it is weightless rubbish

The Major And The Minor
100% they thought of the title and built the movie around it. Ginger Rogers can’t afford the train ticket home so she puts her hair in bunches and pretends to be a child to get the kids price. On the train some conductors get suspicious (I mean Ginger rogers…. a twelve year old?!) and she hides in the cabin of a major who takes this child under his wing, brings her home and yaddayaddayadda they fall in love. It’s cute but also fuuuuucking creepy! “If I squint I can almost see what you’d look like as a woman and you’re going to be very beautiful” etc.. It’s innocent and silly if taken as such but with a modern lens, urgh!

Psycho
Went to see it in the cinema. It’s psycho, what more is there to say?

The Talented Mr Ripley
We just finished the Ripley TV show which we very much liked so we stick this on and it’s shite. Didn’t bother finishing it.

Vault Of Horror
It’s the second tales from the crypt movie and the last one before the cryptkeeper we know and love showed up. It’s decent, not amazing but still surprising at times.

Thunderbolts
Marvel movies are pretty shit but this looks a bit fun from the trailer so…. Oh, it was shit. Fool me one shame on you, fool me, shame on…. Can’t get fooled again.

Good Boy
The effects are basic but effective and it’s a pretty good little atmospheric horror. It is totally carried by the star, Indie, the dog. That dog is just so stinking cute!

[Stormbringer]

Blitz

It's World War 2! Like the title suggests, the Blitz is in full swing. A single mum, working in a munitions factory, sends her son away from London with many other evacuated children aboard a train for the North. He's not having this, because he just wants to be with his mum and live-in granddad, so jumps off the train and goes searching for her, and meets a cast of colourful characters on the way.

It's a snapshot of life in the time of the Blitz, a cross-section of many different aspects of London and how they dealt with the circumstances. It was okay, but it had a strange fixation with certain details that didn't seem terribly important, such as a weirdly elongated scene at a music club in which NONE OF THE CHARACTERS ARE PRESENT, yet it went on and on and on.

Also, there were some peculiar experimental camera techniques and strange abstract shots, used multiple times, which didn't seem to mean anything or have any bearing on the plot, such as some shaky footage of a field of monochrome flowers. It's used three times, I think, cut randomly into the film each time (jarring and motion-sickness inducing), and it's purpose has utterly eluded me.

An odd film indeed. Feels like it wanted to be something more than what it was, but didn't really know what it was, nor what it wanted to be.

[Animalmother]

Frankenstein
As Alan said, it's visually stunning but a dull film otherwise. It's not bad, just plods along and isn't very interesting. The practical effects are top notch and stomach turning in places. Victor Frankenstein is an unlikeable knob end and remains that way the entire film. The guy who plays the monster is very good though.
I really like Del Toro, but his films are rarely (for me anyway) good. I do hope he keeps making them though as his visual style is always very unique and compelling.

[Hatredsheart]

Frankenstein
As Alan said, it's visually stunning but a dull film otherwise. It's not bad, just plods along and isn't very interesting. The practical effects are top notch and stomach turning in places. Victor Frankenstein is an unlikeable knob end and remains that way the entire film. The guy who plays the monster is very good though.
I really like Del Toro, but his films are rarely (for me anyway) good. I do hope he keeps making them though as his visual style is always very unique and compelling.

I enjoyed it for the most part,

Spoiler

I wasn't enamoured with the whole damage regeneration idea though.

[Animalmother]

I've never read to original story but it seems to change from telling to telling about what the monster can do. The version in Penny Dreadful tv is very good, I got the impression that Del Toro may have used it as a template.