Jhe Jiant Jpegs & Jiffs Jhread

[Sly Boots]

I had to google Ezekiel 4:9 muffins to see what in Jehovah's name that's about. Apparently the Ezekiel bread recipe as detailed in the bible requires it to be cooked over human excrement, so I guess you really are what you eat.

Makes sense, I'd always thought of Moby as pretentious shit

[Raid]

5:30am - I like my bedroom to be as cold as possible, but as I live in California that's unlikely to be worth mentioning.
6:30am - I'd talk about my breakfast, but you've probably never heard of it.
8:30am - My garden is more ecologically responsible than yours. Stop killing the planet you monster.
12pm - My farts could probably kill an elephant by this point.
12:30pm - I've now been awake for 7 hours, I consider doing some actual work.
4:30pm - Four hours of work should be enough for anyone. I fuck off and do something else.
6pm - I have now eaten enough beans that I call Elon Musk and ask him to consider me an alternative use as a propellant tank for Starship.
6:30pm - I name drop for at least 90 minutes.
8pm - I realise that my mere four hours of work earlier make me sound out of touch, so I decide I should probably try and squeeze out a few more bars.
10:30pm - Fuck I miss cocaine. Does anyone have some cocaine? You, with the keyboard? You look like you have some cocaine.

[Wrathbone]

[Mantis]

Meanwhile, in the real world:

5:30am - I roll out of bed from under my two duvets. My room is as cold as humanly possible because my landlord still hasn't fixed the broken air vents that are gaffa taped up.
6:00am - I attempt to simultaneously get dressed, drink coffee and eat a bowl of cornflakes so that I can make the 6:15 train. I do my own cleaning, sometimes. Currently there are empty pots littered around the entire kitchen with no clear spot, so I leave todays on the floor.
7:15am - I arrive at work 15 minutes late. My manager tells me that I'm not a team player because my colleagues were all at their desks ready to go bang on 7.
11:00am - I go to the canteen early to beat the queues. I pay £3.50 for soggy toast and some fried eggs which were floating on the surface of a very deep pool of yellow oil.
12:00pm - I get a solid hour of work in while everyone is on lunch.
12:01pm - I give up the notion of getting anymore work done when the Karen's opposite me get back from lunch and spend the rest of the afternoon telling me about the Netflix show they've been watching.
15:30pm - Home time. I spend two hours sat at the train station waiting for a replacement service after my initial booking is cancelled.
17:45pm - I catch my neighbour taking his rubbish out and have an argument with him about the communal corridor stinking of weed again.
18:00pm - I've had the same thing for dinner every night these last two weeks because there was a 3 for 1 offer on frozen meals at Iceland. I'm skint because two thirds of my wages go on rent.
19:00pm - I spend the next three hours feeling exhausted, staring at Reddit and thinking if this is as good as it gets.
10:00pm - I go to bed and spend five hours tossing and turning because the students in the flat above me are having another party.

[Sly Boots]

Meanwhile, in the real world:

5:30am - I roll out of bed from under my two duvets. My room is as cold as humanly possible because my landlord still hasn't fixed the broken air vents that are gaffa taped up.
6:00am - I attempt to simultaneously get dressed, drink coffee and eat a bowl of cornflakes so that I can make the 6:15 train. I do my own cleaning, sometimes. Currently there are empty pots littered around the entire kitchen with no clear spot, so I leave todays on the floor.
7:15am - I arrive at work 15 minutes late. My manager tells me that I'm not a team player because my colleagues were all at their desks ready to go bang on 7.
11:00am - I go to the canteen early to beat the queues. I pay £3.50 for soggy toast and some fried eggs which were floating on the surface of a very deep pool of yellow oil.
12:00pm - I get a solid hour of work in while everyone is on lunch.
12:01pm - I give up the notion of getting anymore work done when the Karen's opposite me get back from lunch and spend the rest of the afternoon telling me about the Netflix show they've been watching.
15:30pm - Home time. I spend two hours sat at the train station waiting for a replacement service after my initial booking is cancelled.
17:45pm - I catch my neighbour taking his rubbish out and have an argument with him about the communal corridor stinking of weed again.
18:00pm - I've had the same thing for dinner every night these last two weeks because there was a 3 for 1 offer on frozen meals at Iceland. I'm skint because two thirds of my wages go on rent.
19:00pm - I spend the next three hours feeling exhausted, staring at Reddit and thinking if this is as good as it gets.
10:00pm - I go to bed and spend five hours tossing and turning because the students in the flat above me are having another party.

Damn dude

[Mantis]

I should point out that isn't actually a reflection of my own life.

[Sly Boots]

Thank god

[Rossell]

[eny]

Rescued by those they were abusing, and the one guy literally shit himself....fucktards.

[eny]

This is some effort:

[Abs_McBain]

[Rossell]

[elgaucho]

The link below shows the world based on there being only 1000 GDP in it. Pretty interesting distribution of wealth!



Full size link: https://preview.redd.it/37edl5f6mu371.p ... 4f24332cd6

[eny]

[Rossell]

The threads pretty good too.